Scandal is Everything
We shall not speak of that horrendous Grey’s Anatomy season premiere with the extraordinarily predictable “twist” at the end.
Instead, here are some very important things we need to discuss about Scandal:
1. The First Lady wore a Bump It! And just, overall, her hair, something was happening in there.
2. Olivia’s hair, its overall flawlessness and bounce.
3. Olivia’s “I’m about to fuck shit up” walk, the speed of it, and the clack of her heels.
4. The First Lady’s tragic tent-like maternity clothes that look like 1988 vomited all over her baby bump.
5. The creepiness of “America’s Baby.”
6. The sexiness between Olivia and Fitz, all that barely being able to touch, the exquisite yearning, the palpable desire. I find their relationship unbearably erotic. I don’t care if he’s a sleazy mean asshole. Frankly, that only increases his appeal for me. Also, he is the president. I respect the office and office reminds me of orifice.
7. Olivia’s sad face.
8. Olivia’s wardrobe, its fierceness, particularly where pants are concerned.
9. The utter incoherence of the Season 2 premiere and how the show was still amazing like a motherfucker.
10. The last couple minutes. Wait, what?
11. Why did Desmond leave the show?
12. Olivia’s makeup, its flawlessness, etc.
13. The Sorkin speed dialogue and how only a fraction of the characters are comprehensible and still, everything makes sense like a motherfucker.
14. The weird flash sound effect during scene transitions. It’s so 1986 LOLWHUT?
PS: Grey’s was just… hateful. I’m so mad at it.
PPS: You should watch TV with Michelle Dean. She is very, very funny.